Blind love

Last time I saw my parents together was on my 19th birthday. They came over to London to visit me for a family day at work – a freshly refurbished pub with a whole brand new team, after some time of working there I learned to call them ‘monsters’ in my secret diaries.

After this day I never saw them the same way as before. My dad decided he raised his little girl so now it’s time for him to have his own life and leave my mum. As if he didn’t choose this life himself. A few months later I find out he’s already got a ‘girlfriend’, which I absolutely wanted to hate from the first day I met her, after a while though, when I managed to calm down and suppress my late teenage anger and frustration, I actually noticed she’s not that bad after all. Of course, there were loads of things that I would change in her, but she tries to be nice to me, I guess, and in some ways makes my dad happy. Ha! Well, he’s raising his little daughter, after all he got his freedom back.

Anyways, as I treated this as the worst life-image ever, I decided that, suddenly, as the most perfect couple in the world is not so perfect anymore, *ahem* love does not exist anymore! Therefore, at that point I probably subconsciously decided to sabotage my own relationship. God, how glad I am, I did it!  My not so perfect boyfriend decided to demonstrate everything my mum thought he was – that is; a sissy pants not manly enough to be able to take care of me (my mum always kept complaining that I was always taking care of him while he couldn’t do the simplest task), a cheat (he finally got enough courage to cheat on me without hiding it too much), irrational (after we argued for like two months I finally told him that I knew everything, his reaction was to throw me out of our shared house), and most of all childish (poor boy cried all the time that he deserved to get more out of life than anyone else). Oh crap I dated an idiot!

Do you remember when every little thing seemed about a thousand times amplified during the teenage years? When a little crush meant the end of the world?

That’s how I felt exactly… As if my life has ended and I’m going to be an old maiden with a zillion of cats! I’m so glad today that I got out of that relationship. Today, instead of a boy moaning that I didn’t cook anything the way his mummy did so he won’t eat it, I have the most handsome man I’ve ever dreamt of, who appreciates everything I do and loves my cooking!

So, I guess, it doesn’t matter how bad you think it is, start thinking positive and good things will come your way. At the end of the day you’ll never know what might come your way tomorrow.

Love,

20DreamGirl

English bastard weather

Hello Everyone!

I’m a Londoner so there’s nothing to say about the forces of nature in a big city like this, there’s hardly any nature at all. Ok… We’ve got Hyde Park, and loads of other little parks scattered around the city, giving each estate at least a place to walk your dog, or go for a run. There’s little to say, maybe one would remember the crowds, heat so bad it made hard to breathe in the underground stations, and traffic – massive traffic that could only give you a fever. That, I would certainly agree with.

It used to make me absolutely angry and annoyed with someone who was saying that in England it only rains and rains… I never saw these rainy months everyone’s been talking about! Ok, I agree that sometimes it rains for hours, or even days, but it wasn’t much different than any other place. Maybe a little bit more humidity out there in the air, maybe the summer isn’t as hot as I’d like it to be, but I always definitely like it when the winters aren’t really that cold. It always used to make me laugh when I noticed schools closing down or public transport shutting down for a day, because – beware! – There was a millimeter of snow on the ground. Joking aside, London is really the last place you would encounter any kind of natural phenomenon.

The only phenomenon I had a chance to be a part of was a beautiful sunny day,  ”24 degrees – hottest day of the year so far!’ Media exclaimed. Therefore, as I was expecting an amazing day I deliberately left my jacket behind. I soon learned not to trust anyone or anything, because the hottest day of the year, the stunning sunny day quickly changed into a scene from a bad horror movie pouring down rain from the black skies that firmed up so quickly I had no chance of escape. Soaked, washed out from make-up or any hair style I arrived at my interview on time, shame that the interviewer didn’t, ‘because he works from home when it rains like that’, good to know that I spent the last two days preparing myself for that interview just to say goodbye, or that I went through half of London in soaking wet clothes to get a cold, without a job.

Maybe one day I will get lucky enough to work from home when it’s raining outside, just because I don’t want to get wet!

Love,

20DreamGirl

In response to The Daily Post’s writing prompt: “Forces of Nature.”

Hello world!

Hello everyone!

For some time now I have been contemplating on starting my own blog. To be honest, I have blogged before, but for some bizarre reason I always kept giving up a few posts in. So what makes this blogging experience different? First of all, this time I am going to blog about things that actually interest me. You can probably figure out what my blog is going to be about from the name of it: 20DreamGirl, I’m a twenty something year old girl, a dreaming girl, who will simply write about a life of a twenty something. Dreams, desires, failures…

I could go on and on… But you get the idea. Maybe, for a good start of our blogging experience, I should introduce myself. I’m 20DreamGirl, let’s say that’s my name 🙂 I live in London, one of the best cities to make your dreams come true; unfortunately, fairy tales, princes and princesses are long gone in a big book hidden away under a bed of a big girl. It’s a start though, where could you make your dream career come true, but one of the biggest cities?

I’m not an actual Londoner. I came here to study and make my biggest lifetime dream real, however, I’d say I’ve lost my perspective by now and stopped dreaming for a while, or at least going after it. It’s ironical like the cliché jokes about a man begging God for millions won in a lottery, at the end God gets impatient and asks the man to buy the ticket if he want to win! I’m a bit like this right now, I really want my dreams come true, but since finishing my university degree it seems like I have forgotten how to go about it, so I’ve done nothing. Hopefully blogging will get me back on track and soon I’ll take the whole world on!

As you already know I’m not a student anymore, not that long ago I finished my education (at least for now), and at the same time I decided I completely didn’t need my demeaning job I hated so much that I’ve put my life on the awful unemployed list. I’m lucky enough, because my amazing boyfriend, who recently was going through the same thing, doesn’t mind this that much. I already had a ban for applying for jobs that I actually don’t want to do – and wait for the golden opportunity, for something that I will enjoy doing. I thought I knew what it meant before, but with every week of sitting at home filling out applications I feel like I forgot what it was that I wanted to do so much, why I wanted to grow up quickly, so I don’t have to study anymore but have my amazing career.

Am I the only one or are there any other twenty something year olds who seem to know what they want, but really they are lost as much as I am?

Lots of love,

20DreamGirl